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My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands | 
enlarge | Author: Chelsea Handler Publisher: Bloomsbury USA Category: Book
List Price: $14.95 Buy New: $7.82 You Save: $7.13 (48%)
New (39) Used (23) from $6.29
Rating: 259 reviews Sales Rank: 210
Media: Paperback Number Of Items: 1 Pages: 213 Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.2 Dimensions (in): 8.2 x 5.4 x 0.8
ISBN: 1582346186 Dewey Decimal Number: 306.7 EAN: 9781582346182 ASIN: 1582346186
Publication Date: June 6, 2005 Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days Shipping: Expedited shipping available Condition: 100% Brand New! - Ships Today! Identical to Amazon's book in every way. Flawless! Not a cheap Remainder or Book Club Copy! *We recommend Expedited Shipping option for much faster mail delivery
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Product Description
In this raucous collection of true-life stories, actress and comedian Chelsea Handler recounts her time spent in the social trenches with that wild, strange, irresistible, and often gratifying beast: the one-night stand.
You've either done it or know someone who has: the one-night stand, the familiar outcome of a night spent at a bar, sometimes the sole payoff for your friend's irritating wedding, or the only relief from a disastrous vacation. Often embarrassing and uncomfortable, occasionally outlandish, but most times just a necessary and irresistible evil, the one-night stand is a social rite as old as sex itself and as common as a bar stool.
Enter Chelsea Handler. Gorgeous, sharp, and anything but shy, Chelsea loves men and lots of them. My Horizontal Life chronicles her romp through the different bedrooms of a variety of suitors, a no-holds-barred account of what can happen between a man and a sometimes very intoxicated, outgoing woman during one night of passion. From her short fling with a Vegas stripper to her even shorter dalliance with a well-endowed little person, from her uncomfortable tryst with a cruise ship performer to her misguided rebound with a man who likes to play leather dress-up, Chelsea recalls the highs and lows of her one-night stands with hilarious honesty. Encouraged by her motley collection of friends (aka: her partners in crime) but challenged by her family members (who at times find themselves a surprise part of the encounter), Chelsea hits bottom and bounces back, unafraid to share the gritty details. My Horizontal Life is one guilty pleasure you won't be ashamed to talk about in the morning.
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| Customer Reviews: Read 254 more reviews...
I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE SEQUEL! May 14, 2005 20 out of 22 found this review helpful
I just finished reading "My Horizontal Life" and I have to say, it was the most fun I think I've ever had reading a book. I was laughing so hard at some of these stories that I was calling people up to quote lines over the phone (I know that's annoying if you're on the other end but it had to be done). In fact, when I finished reading it, I picked it back up and read a couple of the stories again.
As a fan of stand-up comedy (the author is a comedienne), I expected the book to be full of jokes and it is, but what I didn't expect is that it would be so revealing, sweet and engaging. By the last page, I felt like I knew the author as well as some of my closest friends.
Whether or not you yourself have had a one-night stand, you will be able to relate to the things that happen to her. Okay, maybe we haven't all dated a male stripper who's "every gay guy's fantasy" but we've all dated someone we sadly discovered is not so bright or who doesn't have a good grasp of our language. Personally, I think even a nun would find this book amusing. But I wouldn't buy it for her. I'd hope she'd just stumble upon it on her own.
I've read many humor book over the years and the problem with a lot of them is that they're just not that funny. This one delivers.
HOTT MESS June 17, 2005 6 out of 6 found this review helpful
Watch out Chris Rock.....You have some competition because Chelsea Handler is showing the world that she is funny...funny...funny....
Who cares if she has slept around......It's her business. But, I look at this book as a cautionary tale and young women everywhere can learn from her. You are probably not going to find love on a one-night stand....you might even lose your dignity, but you'll never lose your sense of humor...and isn't that what it is really all about? Not taking ourselves so seriously.....
I can't wait for the next installment! August 7, 2008 6 out of 6 found this review helpful
Chelsea's smart, funny and raunchy in a hold nothing back sort of way that makes you wonder what Mae West might be like if she were around today. This is exactly what a collection of fictional comedic vignettes should be. I also recommend my favorite self-help book about love I Love You. Now What?: Falling in Love is a Mystery, Keeping It Isn't
A must read! May 18, 2005 4 out of 4 found this review helpful
You have to read this book! Chelsea's stories will remind you of a story you've either been through and didn't know how to laugh about yet, or of a story a "good friend" has told you...but just couldn't divulge all of the details. She is honest, funny, and compassionate...a rare find in a woman who is willing to tell you such intimate details about her sex life...in the most humorous way possible. Chelsea makes you remember that it's okay to be a woman...and still be human. Did I mention it's hysterical?
ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS! January 22, 2006 4 out of 4 found this review helpful
I saw Miss Handler on the Isaac Mizrahi show and thought she was amusing, so I purchased this book. Well, start to finish, I laughed and laughed. Her honest accounts of life's journeys were absolutely hilarious and I could not put this book down! I have since passed this book on to several girlfriends and they too found it hilarious. I highly recommend this book!
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